Well i don’t know how this post gonna be and actually i can’t care less… but i need to write…because that’s the only thing on my mind since yesterday…no matter what i have been doing am stuck at that moment…am in such a daze….am in such awe…am in love all over again….
We were at a beautiful uninhabited island…yeah u got it right.. ‘uninhabited’ !! Just like movies..crystal clear emerald waters lapping eagerly at the white coral-sand beach…perfect weather, scorching sun, banana boat-rides and other water sports on one side, snorkeling, swimming and lazy water fun in front of us…calling out to us as we watched the fun lying on our chaise lounges in the shade of the parasol slathering dollops of ‘sun-scream’ (coined by hubby) all over… (can’t afford to be lobster-faced sunburnt anymore…remember last year’s the good,bad and uhhh..the beautiful).
In a while we were ready to go !!!! Yaaay…we took our inner-tubes and gently made our way through the white coral pebbly sand, careful not to step on the scurrying crabs and other rich fauna. And then the feel of water..cool soothing water in the hot sun as we treaded carefully inside and plopped ourselves atop the tubes..
I was lost in my darling’s eyes…gently teasing him that i don’t like sun-bathing…worried about the changing color of my skin..but he was lost somewhere else…his eyes focused at something far-off…something was troubling him..and when i asked what and when he mentioned that we have drifted quite far…i turned to see the shore really far off and the warning rope line right by our back…but still i wasn’t really scared…(i really never am when he is by my side…i know he will take care)…i was kind of oblivious of everything else but his eyes remained fixed and his mind racing he sounded firm.. ‘no seriously, we must go back’. And that got me. We needed to do something and fast.We had to cover the distance against the current and I don’t know how to swim, he does a bit…the pool kind…not the Pacific kind…he jumped out of his tube all the while holding onto mine and began pushing me and tugging me in the shore’s direction. And in a while i saw the rope by my left side now i.e. we had actually started midway of the beach…went straight 100 mts into the waters and now we were 100 mts to the right at the same distance away from the shore…and at this point in a flash he lost ground…and fumbled…water bobbling around his face as he glanced at me hastily wiping his eyes gasping for breath…and i would never forget that look…that one second…i saw fear in his eyes…and i went blank…i just shouted asking him to get hold of his tube…he pulled himself up enough to anchor his right arm across the tube, all the while still holding onto mine…i couldn’t get out of it because the water was more than our heights there (actually quite more atleast 7 feet) and that would only cause more trouble for him to handle things. He strictly warned me not to get down and with his left hand he held onto me and the other through the tube, he swam with one hand all across that length till he was sure we were safe…till we reached the rocks of the shore…and all through this… i sat frozen….afraid of attempting any wrong moves and all through my eyes were fixed on my man…whose eyes, all through this, just kept telling me one thing… ‘i won’t let go’ !
He held onto me more than his life ! And i so mean it. I could see that in his eyes..all through those 10-15 odd mins that seemed an eternity…i could see that when he was flooded with water…out of breath, struggling in water…getting breathless…losing ground, gasping for breath but his eyes fixed on me and his grip firm on me. He didn’t let go of the rope of my tube even once all through this…even when he was on the verge…not even when he was clueless for that one moment…no never…all he saw was me…all he held onto was me…more than his life…
That fearless madness in his eyes…that selflessness…that courage…i mean i know and he knows we both would go to our last possible limits for each other…and there’s the faith..the love…and the courage…to fight against the tide and time…to hold on forever…the madness of ‘i won’t let go’. To do it against one’s own life…setting aside all fears..I saw it in his eyes…yesterday…all through…those few minutes…as he saved my life…as he saved our life…as he became my real Hero my HE-man !! I mean he has been my hero always !!! The handsome dashing good boy best match kind…but the brave fearless fierce kind…gosh !!! He is my that Hero now !!!! And i’m in a compete daze since yesterday…stuck at that moment….as i see my hero eating walking sleeping waking laughing talking before me…am in such a daze…am afraid to touch him….lest this disappears…but no…this actually is…this happened…he did it ! My MAN…the simple school buddy in shorts…my simple child-like innocent…God-fearing loving handsome hubby did this !!! I wana hug him so tight !!! I wana kiss him so hard that time freezes us there and then together forever….I have been doing that since yesterday…and i would do that when he is back home in a few mins now…i am just gonna hold onto him tight…very tight…for life….
This whole thing is still taking a while to seep in…yesterday after sometime..on the beach i just asked him… we know and expect that we would go beyond our limits to save the other but literally how many are actually capable of doing that..i mean the fear of one’s life is so overwhelming in itself…how many can just pick it up and trash it aside saying…get out of my way…she/he is my life ! He just smiled… he has been quieter all day…or maybe i feel that because i am in that state…where there’s so much in ur mind and so little comes out…i wasn’t able to know what was disturbing me so much….i wasn’t able to comprehend…yesterday whole day thereafter we kept doing things normally…enjoying the beach…parasailing (he loooooved it !! his delightful expression was priceless! And the mid-air kiss too 🙂 🙂 ) collecting shells,wearing our beach special clothes, traveling and reaching to the safe harbor back home…
As we settled on the bed for the night relaxing into the normal routine, i sighed some relief in saying ‘the pleasure of travel is in getting back home’ and in a while we called back home…talked a while and as we switched off the lights and called it a day..i said..don’t sleep yet..i got something to tell you…but i didn’t know what…just something was very unsettling within me..and i wasn’t able to catch hold of it…lying by his side clutching onto his arms…all i could mutter is… ‘phir aise mat karna…’ (don’t ever do this again) … ‘ur life is not just urs’… to that after a moment of quiet..he replied… ‘isiliye to dar lagta hai…’ and tears rolled down my cheeks as he hushed me and we held onto each other tightly…
Yesterday night i told him….there are many people in love…but very few can be selfless in love…and you are Jaan…you have achieved that…you are so selfless….you love me so much…more than life…literally ! And not just yesterday…daily every small and big thing, u put my happiness my wishes first upfront…And i just don’t know how to put into words what i have been feeling since that moment yesterday….bas u come home and i will hold onto you…forever….i love u my jaan….i love u my sweetheart….too much… +1…..
My brave fearless fierce SUPERMAN my HE-Man…My Man.. I LOVE UUUUUUUUUU !!!!!!
I remember in our bf-gf days i used to tease him sometimes like…that scene in the movie ‘Cheeni Kum’ where some hooligans are troubling Tabu and AB being quite aged and knowing that he can’t match them in strength…shouts out a violent cry with all his might and that scares them away…i use dot ask my lanky soft-spoken bf… ‘what would u do if some thugs attack us on the road…would u also shout like this’ …and laugh teasing him like this…but now i know…what he can do….he can and will do everything he can and beyond…he is one brave man !!!! He is my Hero !!!! What we see is in movies…but i have in him is my own HERO !!!!!!! I guess that’s why my first ever sms to him said ‘Hi He-Man’ !!
Kyun hai na jaan 🙂 🙂 Mmmmmmmuuuuaaaahhhhhh…….
Main to teri fan ban gayi….khaitan ! Phir-se !!!!! All over again !!! Haiiiiii……….
Just for you 😉 I LOVE UUUU !!!!!!!!! Tu mera Hero !!!!!! Hai Jaan phirse pyaar ho gaya mujhe to…Mmmmmmmuaaaaaahhhhhhh !!!! I love uu toooo muchhhh….+1…..